“Rachel: “Okay, James.”Ross: (Pleasantly surprised) “Huh.”
Rachel: “But, only if it’s a girl”
Ross: “Okay, veto . . . I like Ruth. What about Ruth?”
Rachel: “Oh, I’m sorry. Are we having an 89-year-old ? . . How about Dayton?”
Ross: “Veto. Stewart?”
Rachel: “Veto. Sawyer?”
Ross: “Veto. Helen?”
Rachel: “Veto”
Phoebe: “Is it me, or is Veto starting to sound really good?”
This is one of my favorite scenes from the TV show “Friends.” I used to laugh so much at how indecisive Ross and Rachel were about baby names, but now, I halfheartedly laugh, all the while commiserating with their pain.
My husband Matt and I are currently living out this scene. Ever since we learned we were having another girl, we have been on the hunt for the name that would best suit her.
We want the name to 1) be meaningful; 2) incorporate each of our cultures; 3) and bonus points if it’s original or unique. For a while, I got hung up on the unique part and my suggestions included names that would be scrutinized not only by her peers on the playground, but if we were celebrities, I could see tabloid covers splashed with a photo of us with the headline “What were they thinking?” With each of my unique suggestions, our conversations replicated a United Nations General Assembly gathering where Matt was thankful to be able to use veto power. I quickly realized that one of her names would come from my Malagasy heritage, and that would be considered plenty unique enough for here in America.
When naming our daughter Gracelyn, the process seemed so much easier. We both created a list of baby names we liked and did research on the meanings of the names, then presented them to each other. My husband brought forth the name Gracelyn. I was hesitant at first, but quickly came around to loving it after a particularly eye-opening experience. The theme of God’s grace was ever so present during our pregnancy with Gracelyn, it just made sense.
With this baby, however, the other potential names we liked have either been “taken” by relatives or friends for their children so we’d feel like we were stealing if we used it also. That’s obviously not the truth, since names aren’t copyrighted; but I’d like to avoid any drama or hurt feelings.
Then there’s the immense pressure that this is going to be the name she would (hopefully) keep for the rest of her life. What if we named her incorrectly? I’ve known people who had a few names to pick from and didn’t decide on a name till after meeting their child, but Matt and I do not work like that. We want one less thing to worry about come labor and delivery time, so a name must be decided on before then!
To help us, we downloaded an app called “Baby Name.” It’s considered the Tinder of baby names. You swipe right for the names you like, left for the names you don’t. Your partner does the same, and if you both like one, it lets you know of the match. We currently have eight matches. This is after having the app for many weeks. But we’re not fully in love with our matched names, either. I think we swiped right because they weren’t as crummy as some of the others. And would any of them work with the other name we choose that has Malagasy heritage? It’s not looking like it.
We also checked out several books from the local public library. You’d think with looking at over 100,000 names and names from all over the world, we would have come up with a handful we liked. Nope, not yet.
We’ve pondered it all. Should this daughter have the same initials as Gracelyn? Should she have a first name that starts with the letter G, also? Should we go with a theme? Something Biblical? A meaningful place maybe? Should we name her after a relative? If so, which relative?
Then there are all these other things to think about: awkward initials, nicknames, the spelling of the name, possible mispronunciation of the name.
It all can be overwhelming. But, what a great responsibility! Sometimes I wonder, maybe we’re overthinking it. We have a few more weeks (hopefully) until Baby Girl is to make her appearance. Maybe it’s time to start at the beginning. Wish us luck!
Can you relate to our situation? What tips do you have for naming baby?
