I’m not anti-resolution. Like everyone else I have a history populated by self-promises, that, unfortunately, rarely made it to the first day of spring. Change, even change for the better, is easy to plan but hard to achieve. If I had to pick a list of resolutions that I thought I had a good chance of achieving, it might look something like this:
- eat more
- spend recklessly
- watch more t.v.
Not my best work at all.
On the other hand, do you know what the most common resolutions in our culture are?
*quit smoking
*lose weight
*get out of debt
*drink less
*eat healthier
These are goals that anyone would be proud to put on their bulletin board. The challenge is not making the list, the challenge is being able to persist.
So now that I’ve established a range of possibilities to put on your New Year’s Resolutions list, let me ask you a question. Why January 1? Somehow we think it’s a magical date. The magic day that everything will change.
But what happens when the calendar and our motivation don’t align?
I wonder if making changes in our lives should happen not on a specific date, but when we have the strength to tackle something big, the determination to do the work.
In late November, I went on a Facebook diet. Suffice it to say that I recognized how much time Facebook was pulling me away from “real life.” So I deleted Facebook from my phone. I did it right at the moment I had the realization that time spent with my family and friends was more valuable. Had I stopped to process all the pros and cons or said, “In the New Year, I’ll spend less time on Facebook. Yes, that will be my 2017 resolution,” I’d have spent the last few weeks thinking, “Spend every waking moment on Facebook, because come January 1 it’s all over!”
Instead, I cut myself off instantly. When I picked up my daughter from school that afternoon, she asked to see photos of a new baby cousin. “I deleted Facebook from my phone,” I told her. I wish I’d taken a photo of her face. She was shocked, confused, perplexed. Her response told me everything I needed to know. My face was stuck in my phone, connecting with Facebook more than I was connecting with the people under my nose.
I didn’t go cold turkey. It’s still on my laptop. I “allow”myself Facebook time in the morning and the evening. And I have been able to keep it up, much to my family’s amazement.
I have learned that the key is not the calendar date but the alignment of your desire with your intent. Once that occurs, your chance for success increases.
My “new year, new you” started on November 21 – in the middle of the day! I believe my “resolution” is sticking because I resolved to make a change when the time was just right for me.
I love the idea of people taking charge of their lives and making changes and improving themselves. I just wonder if we are so caught up in the calendar that we forget to watch for signs 364 other days of the year.
