Sports in general has been an important part of our family. My husband when young, swam, played rugby, soccer, field hockey, ran track, and participated in gymnastics. I swam, played tennis, field hockey, ran track, and also dabbled in gymnastics.
When our children came along, they started to try different sports. Soccer, or Football as we call it in Africa, was a natural sport to have them play. Our oldest son Michael started playing at the age of five. Soon enough Benjamin came along, and we had two boys playing recreational soccer and then proceeded to enroll them in competitive leagues. We had no intention of having them play professionally unless they really had a desire and the skill set to match. What we got out of the competitive travel leagues was camaraderie with the parents and players amongst themselves; a soccer community of sorts that has had lasting bonds.
Between our boys, they have played soccer for a total of 26 years. Our youngest came along and while we were on the sidelines watching and cheering the boys, she would be in her infant car-seat, and later toddling at the field. Our sons’ teammates have watched her grow over the years.
Cheering for me was in the form of screams and positive hollers. If I did not want my sons to be embarrassed, I would call them out by their middle name, which are ethnic. I would not be surprised if someone just thought I was saying something random. My boys would tell me they heard me call them out.
It will be a while before we have another soccer player in our home. Our daughter was born when our second-born was 9 years old, and she much prefers gymnastics. We enjoy watching her, but I cannot ignore the fact that I will miss watching my sons playing a team sport. We visited the high school soccer field one last time to take senior pictures for my second son. It felt nostalgic and the feeling showed in some of my son’s pictures – the ones with a serious look. I asked him how he felt being there, and he said it was bittersweet. It was his choice to have the soccer field as one of the locations for pictures, so I obliged him.
Our oldest son is now a college senior and after leaving high school soccer, he found excitement in returning to the field through intramural soccer. He played on both men’s and coed teams. Our high school senior will graduate soon and is attending community college. He hopes he can return to the field in some form as a player. In the meantime, he is a soccer referee, which he enjoys. The games he enjoys refereeing the most are the adult leagues, because they are different with fast-paced grown ups!
For those of you who still have children playing sports, please make the time to watch and cheer them. Watch them knowing that the time flies, but still relish those moments. The gifts in the end are the friendships and familial bonds created. Our children also learned to become both leaders and team-players. Our oldest son ended up managing the varsity team in his senior year of high school. It was not the ideal outcome for him, but by the end of the season he had grown in character and earned the respect of his peers. Our second born was one of four captains of his team two years in a row. These players learn mutual respect and leadership skills that they can carry long after they walk off the field. Skills that are learned through life experiences are at times more valuable than those learned from a book. We may mourn the end of team sports, but we remain grateful for the life experiences that we all gained from it, as players and parents on the sidelines.
